Blog#14 chevron

This past weekend we read parshat chayei sara. In America there is no real celebration or significant happening that shows our appreciation for the fact that our patriach avrohom bought this land from efron in chevron. Yes we talk about the fact that efron offered it to avrohom for nothing but avrohom insisted that he pay. Efron accepted the money and avrohom buried Sara. Aside from that we kind of just ignore the fact that Jews should outright claim the area and should not have to share the site. Furthermore the restriction of Jews  not being allowed into the main room for majority of the year is appalling. I won't blog on politics but this past weekend I had the privilege of going to chevron for this Shabbat. The Israeli citizens celebrate this by going en masse. There are no hotels there, and no kosher restaurants to take out food. The Jews (15,000) just come with camping gear and set up tents. So as you can imagine I was dead set against going.  However my husband promised me no tents and we would be eating catered food. OK so food and sleeping arrangements were made. However, I am very vigilant in not going to unsafe places. Chevron has a population of 200,000 Arabs. There are 91 Jewish families scattered within one neighborhood. The closest Jewish city is kiriyat arba. That has population of 10,000 Jews. This city is ten minute walk from chevron. Which still makes it not so safe..my husband and others promised me that it's the safest Shabbat I'll ever have. I can attest to that now. There was at least a soldier every 5 feet when walking from kiriyat arba (where we slept) to chevron where we ate. In chevron itself there were at least 5_10 soldiers every couple of feet. In fact what was so comical was my son saying Shabbat shalom and toda rabba to each one... at times he didn't stop..... I was also told that on this Shabbat the Arabs have movement restrictions. Additionally they are not allowed to go into the marat hamechpala the whole Shabbat. So yes in the end I did feel safe.

I can not describe the feeling of eating in the chevron "simcha hall" while looking out the window and seeing this mammoth building of the marat machepela that sits on the land that we know avrohom bought and knowing that all of our forefathers and mothers are right there. What a privilege as my husband made kidush I suddenly felt connected to my religion. I also felt very privileged to be eating inside with 300 or so others, as opposed to out in a tent :-)
The Friday night meal was beautiful there were many soldiers who quickly came and ate with us.  Many Kennest members add high ranking sergeants, colonels and police officers. Who have thousands of soldiers and police officers underneath them ate with us as well.The clincher for me at this meal came when I started to speak to the other family at our table. The wife told me she comes every year. She stays with her cousin who lives in chevron. My immediate question was...isn't she terrified?????!!! Her response to me " no  the Arabs are scared of her" I saw the cousin who sat at the next table. she didn't look scarier than anyone else that I know. Just a regular person who is raising her family in a very special place. Without her family and the 90 others we the Jews would surely not have this part of Israel.  What a higher goal!!!!  Shabbat after noon we did a walking tour of the Avraham avinu neighbourhood with simcha hochbaum. Was truly amazing...the past 10 years of history there were many terrorist attacks in chevron. Simcha took us to couple of these place. One was where a mother was walking her child in a stroller in the city street in broad daylight.her child was shot to death by a sharpshooter. After this tragedy this family didn't leave but stayed and had more kids. There refusal to move out is meant to she strength and courage will not deter!!! There was another sad and similar story where a husband and wife were brutally murdered in the street by a walking Arab man with a bomb in his shirt. They noticed him walking towards the children's park and wrestled him to the ground. Killing only themselves and saving many children. One more tragic story was a man who was stabbed to death in his home. The wife vowed not to leave chevron instead she asked that a building be built so that young men can come learn. Now there is a vibrant yeshiva in her backyard. One can only look up to these people who show such determination to live for a higher goal. While it was an awesome feeling to be there for the entire shabbat, the lesson I walked away with was the following. We live our lives with a goal in mind to be good and kind people, to be good parents, however somehow a real sacrifice for religion tendsto get lost. While yes I admit before this Shabbat I thought to myself... wow I'm living in the holy land, God must think I'm really great..she really gave up a lot to be here In my land. But this weekend that changed. Instead I think now those people living in chevron and kiriyat arba, although somewhat insane , really are sacrificing for their religion. What a higher standard of living!!! What can I /you say we sacrifice for our religion that can equate to the Jewish residents of chevron and kiriyat arba? is there any???

Blog #12 sacrifices

When you make a sacrifice do you usually feel good or bad about the choice you just made? Most people usually feel good about the sacrifices they made ....otherwise they wouldn't have made it... Right?  After meeting a good portion of the people on my block I realized that I was definitely NOT the only one who left alot behind. Ie houses, cars, live in help, nicer cars, etc. Yet most of these people seem happy. Although I really didn't ask them if they are presently happy, nor did I ask them how long it took to feel that the sacrifice they made to come here was the right one. However, I know that after speaking to a handful of people... they all left behind an easier way of living.  A way of living that if you want...(which most people who left America want...) can only be done  if one is receiving income from an American company. Which then requires you to work American hours or travel frequently back and forth. Of course there maybe other exceptions... Cough cough;-) but again you see the sacrifices people make to be in the holy land and maintain the lifestyle one is accustomed too...
So let The truth be told the sacrifice of leaving the Golden America is definitely not an easy one. After just one month of being here I am realizing that ....what in the world did I just do....hmm I left behind my house that I loved and basically completely redesigned to my taste....including a "functional kitchen" yes the one here is very dysfunctional. My car ( OK it was a leased Volvo.. But it had a gear for parking!!$%%), supermarkets that carry products I am used too... and a country full of people that speak and understand my language.. Not to mention all the little things that made me happy there. (Refer to previous blog..on things I'll miss) So as of right now... I can not say that the sacrifice that I made was the right one. However what can be said is that at least the sacrifice was made..now I just have to realize somehow, and someway, that it was the right one...

Blog#11 bigger picture

Living in america as an observant Jew you really never get to feel that you are part of a something big. You actually always feel like you are the minority. That's because we really are... I know i felt like that living in.. yes ny. However living in Israel for about a month now and being around lots of Israelis all the time now... I am starting to notice how everyone is celebrating the same holidays as I. I am starting to realize that I am no longer a minority. That I am a part of something a lot bigger rather than just being another randomite.. And I am not just referring to the religious people living in my hood ...obviously I'm specifically referring to the secular Israel's. Going to the mall, going to the beach, shopping in all types of stores ie linens, kitchen ware, going to the grocery store, getting manicure  eating in diff restaurants,  getting gas, yes the kotel etc... you see all different types of Israelis and when they wish you a Shana Tova or chag sameach you start to realize .. hey this is strange I'm part of these people. I belong to them and they belong with me. I may not literally understand them :-) but I am starting to understand that I am part of them and that theres a bigger picture here. There's a country ( six million ..i think)full of people that share the same religion / customs as me. You may not think that's wild but what really blows me away is that these people not only share my religion but they literally put there life on the line to protect me and everyone else living in this country. So the next time I/you feel that.. hey we are just another dot in this world think of all the people living in this country there's plenty of them just like you. To be in line with the holiday we are in ...I bring to the light that us Jews consists of many different types ...just like the arba minim. Enjoy your chag and know you are not the minority.... at least not in the Holy Land!

Blog#10 adjusting?!#$@

When people ask me how I am adjusting to my aliyah I just say OK. I don't think they really want to know all my gripes and complaints. Additionally I don't think my fellow blog readers either want to know. In general I don't think most people really care about other peoples issues when inquiring about people's state of mind. However I do think that it is good for people who are having a rough time to vent. Tonight I went to a nefesh bnefesh event for new olim for parents with kids in school. What adjustment they are going through and what parents can do to help. Personally I thought it was an AA meeting ..you know..small room with handful of parents. In turned out to be quite comical. The topics in my mind always concluded with how Israel has its own culture and how different Americans are. For example the lecturer mentioned how Israeli s don't have boundaries. My son told me one of the first days of school how when he put his water bottle down at the lunch table everyone started taking and drinking from it. As if it was for everyone. His expression when he told me was complete shock I reacted the same way. A lady mentioned similar story where her kid brought doritos and everyone dug their hands into her bag too. Trying to Look at that with a positive eye i guess i can tell my son that it's nice to share but we can still maintain our boundaries..Lecturer also mentioned how Israelis teachers are more emotional. Another incident where my son came home and said."mom right its not good middos to get angry and yell" I answered yes. He said well my Mora screamed at me for no reason. I did land up speaking to the teacher and clarify what may have happened. The point I'm trying to bring out is that while I am an American/Canadian and living in Israel there are challenges that I am faced with aside from the biggie of not speaking Hebrew. There are lots of cultural changes that need to be learned like why do stores close at 11and reopen at 5? Why does my car not have a gear for park? Why did the warranty guy sound like he was breaking my oven instead of connecting it? Why didnt any of the delivery guys or handy man clean up the mess they made? Why are there stores in the underground parking lots? Why does everything seem so small in this country? (Including the kitchen)
Why did I only pay 60 shekels to fix two blown out tires?

Why do I keep reaching left to turn on the light in my bedroom.??? (That's only bec I had my light switch on the left in Monsey...I wonder when my brain will stop doing that)

I have tons more Q's on the differences. But the bottom line is we are different culturally and that's something I personally wont change but can try to live with.
So when asked how i am adjusting I think the correct answer would be... yeah...adjusting.

Blog#9 G-ds winks

When things go as planned or without any issues....Do you stop and think oh that was helpful, and then carry on with your day?/life. So I admit yes that was me for the past number of years. But now  as I 'm trying to Adjust to "life" here I am trying to see  and use the borrowed phrase (from my hubby) g-ds winking at me. Explanation right????

As I am "absorbing" to life here things are really frustrating. Obviously not knowing the language is the number one issue. So any of the day to day tasks where you need to talk really become a HUGE hassle. Such as going to the bank. Of course this should be fairly easy. Who goes to tellers any more? You just use the atms. OK so let's say you didn't get your debit cards yet.....

So that was the mission which wasn't supposed to be too difficult because we had an English representative. Our luck our local bank was closed and it was Sunday!!! So next challenge go to any other local branch "speak " to the teller and take out cash. Ok next stop another local branch.... Follow waze our new Israeli navigator. ....Don't you love it when you rely on technology and it totally craps out on you@#%& . So we arrive at or destination... A traffic circle????!!! OK don't ask anyone just yet  we will find it. OK. Ask someone now ...because we just drove up and down the same street 5 times!!! Ok ask someone else because that person must have lied or had no clue. Ok never mind asking anyone just park the car and walk. Ok place is found ...phew. Next challenge talk to a teller. Oh first get reprimanded by someone who obviously waited a long time and wants you to be just as stressed as she is to take a ticket. Ok we take the stinking ticket and then out of nowhere comes the wink from g-d. I noticed the teller. Its my sisters nephew from her husband side... A fellow Canadian.  Yeah I remembered vaguely some one in my family mentioned he worked at a bank.  Good luck? or g-ds wink? Our number is called we ask for the specific teller. The challenge of not knowing Hebrew is now eliminated. Thank you g-d for your wink and  the challenges that come only for what I  can handle....
One more story to share on g-ds wink. So we finally got our debit cards from our branch and with signing up with that bank they gave out a pocket size dictionary. You know the ones you had for school. So post that errand came the grocery shopping. Local store in rbs Thursday night... Looks just like Rockland or Wesley kosher. Crowded and long lines. No worries everyone in rbs speaks English. To the spices section we go as I'm dropping different spices into my buggy my son starts opening the chocolate milk box drinks. While trying to ignore the situation of him begging to have one and then letting him have one and him saying we didn't pay yet I start to tune him out and figure out which one might be the basil. OK so my motto is try not to speak.... as my son continues to beg for my attention I notice the dictionary in the cart. Great I'll look up basil. that must have been a classic site..I wish I could have been an outsider seeing that. LOOSER!!!!..right??? The next best thing happens... a teenager girl says in her brokenish english you need help looking for something. G-ds little wink. I'm hoping to continue to see them and of course to thank g-d for them....by winking back.

Blog#8 whose your hero

I know that hero's are usually people who sacrifice their lives for a higher cause. Like 911 firefighters. Although many times I am mistaken and believe hero's are the ones who score the winning goal in the dying minutes of a playoff hockey game. Or who hit a home run in the bottom of the ninth to win the world series. However today my real hero was my son. He, although not really given the choice,walked into a class where knowing the teachers only speak Hebrew, and knowing he was not going with any friends went into his classroom with confidence and without a tear. Simply no fear! (I am hoping that stays)Truthfully he is a kid, and some kids are just better at adapting to diff situations than others. My kid is usually more set in his ways and change of order or schedule usually does not go well with him. So today I was amazed at his disposition in this situation. No struggle, no fight, no debates. Just straight up confidence! I am wondering if that came, literally with the territory?  Does living here... in this great country change who we are?  Does this land impact our personalities and we don't realize it. I know it's a 1000000 times easier to remain religious here, (because everyone is doing the same thing) but by living here does our personalities inherently change, do we re prioritize our priorities? Was there an ingredient that g.d put in this land that if we live in his land we become a different person than  we would be by living somewhere else.....only time will tell!
For now ...There are many heroes this great country has had and we can all think of so many but what I think is the common trait amongst them is the lack of fear to do what's right. My son has taught me that today. I hope that in the right situations I too will not be afraid of this land and what it has to offer me. It is different, it is foreign, it is scary but if i want to be hero i must also be fearless.

Blog #7 oleh chadasha

I realize my blog title is pre aliyah...its been two days since my arrival to Israel. I am now considered an oleh chadasha translated as New citizen. The plane ride was extremely awesome. I can say it was a little emotional as there is nothing like over 130 new cadets entering into the Israeli army singing am yisrael Chai. Dovid melech. Shavu vonim as our plane touched down. It made me really think that although this is my husband's dream I should have also wanted to join him in desiring to reside in Israel.  The ceremony en route to Ben gurion airport was very satisfying. I thought about many ideas. Such as do any other countries makes such a big to deal when citizens return to their own countries. Ie Italians to Italy? Russians to Russia? I have never seen or read about that....
The prophecy about the in gathering of the Jews back to israel is surely being played out. I felt that loud and clear when I looked at the people on the flight... Allot of them were not religious. What was it that made them want to return? After all America is America!! Why leave it..... there's so many more luxuries there. They have to be outright crazy to want to leave that all behind and more. Nefesh bnefesh also mentioned we were the 50th flight since 2002, and since then 35,000 Jews have returned to Israel.

After walking across the front of the terminal with the mob of yfamily members and soldiers cheering for us I felt a sense of pride. I did give up allot to come and I should feel pride in this tremendous change. I realized that This is our land if i/we don't acquire it who will. God gave it to the jews. He gave it to abraham. God told him to leave his father's home his birthplace;The land that he is familiar. And follow god to a place which He will show him. Eretz canan. Follow god blindly.... I am now also  fulfilling this age old commandment. I am now a citizen of Israel. And I also feel like I'm following god blindly. However I do realize that this was a choice and I now will also choose to try and make it work.

Blog#6 I hate goodbyes

Does anyone like saying goodbye? Obviously I am not referring to temporary goodbyes where you drop off your kid and pick him up couple of hours later. Im referring to the more permanent ones. However if you think of it most goodbyes are temporary unless we talk about death.
And when referring to that we almost never get any warning to say goodbye. So we can honestly say that the goodbye I'm referring to is temporary and should nevertheless be easy. Yet when I think about saying goodbye to my family on Monday I feel the heart strings pull. I am sooo fortunate to have been blessed with great family members.
I have seen and been around lots of different families and noticed their dynamics.  I can only say again how genuine my family is and how much we all care for eachother. There really isn't a time that I wouldn't help them out to the best of my ability.

Aside from my immediate siblings I truley will miss wholeheartedly my nieces and nephews. They always are there to show me how great it is to be an aunt abs still feel like a kid.

The hardest person to say goodbye to is my bubby and for obvious reasons..see above..we just really never know. So the tugging of the heart intensifies...we all live our lives with difficulties of trying to properly raise our own families. many times we have conflicts about what options to take to ensure our families are growing in the right way. I feel that moving to Israel is certainly a better place to raise a jewish family with a solid foundation. So with that decision I must pay a price of not being around my bubby that often. Sigh. Ugh. Gulp. Sniff

In regards to my parents well I know I'll see them often. They are now  retired and have gone to Israel very often. In fact they will be there a day before me for a couple of months :-) so to them I won't have to say goodbye..

Lastly..you know what they say abt what you should do when you miss your mother in law.. reload and shoot again:-).that could also be said about your father in law:-) although my in laws have treated me so respectfully I couldn't have asked for better ones

With the above in mind I will try to stay positive and convince the tuggings in my heart that this goodbye is only temporary.

See ya all on the other side.

Blog #5 Things I'll miss

Not that I'll never visit America again.. I just wanna see how spoiled I am by being an American/Canadian. So here I go and this is not in any particular order but if you know me you'll know what weighs more heavily than others. So for starters as any north American would say the first thing id miss is my shopping.To be more specific we all enjoy that comfort when we are down in the dumps and need a pick up so we go shopping. My place is tices corner in nj. That place just provides me with the temporary pick me up I need at that moment. Close enough to home to go anytime if day. I can do so much shopping there and never get tired.:)(

Some other things id definitely miss is being on the same time zone as my sports teams. I can't imagine not being able to watch live games or having to stay up at three am to watch live. Or wait until the next am to watch a game I already know the score to.

Other adventures that are enjoyable are the Costco runs. As much as I hate the lines I love shopping there. Not to mention the pallisades mall..and of course going back to visit friends and family in Toronto and the shopping there. As well as going back to wasaga beach...

I wont bother with mentioning ny restaurants because I'm sure Israel kicks in that area. But dunkin donuts , and Starbucks will surely be missed. Not to mention my favorite new organic grocery store:(

Although my commute to work is long I love taking the ferry. Provides much needed away time to breathe  easily and think. Being that it's summer now its easier to say I'll miss the ferry..if it'd be Winter I wouldn't have mentioned it at all.

Talking about commutes. I'll definitely miss my car. Again not to be too spoiled but I have no clue what we will end up with. I'm hoping it's not luigi from cars. Aka a fiat...

In terms of my house I will miss it all.... definitely my kitchen ...my ovens my dishwashers and my big sinks. Oh and the cupboards. I know I'm getting into a smaller kitchen. But I actually have not seen it..so I have no clue what it looks like. I'm a pessimist so I'm sure it will be alot smaller. The rest of the house goes without saying. I pretty much changed everything with in it so it all has my personality. It hurts to leave this house but it really brings home the point that everything is temporary and we don't take any of this stuff with us ..when we die. So with that I say enjoy the life  you have today and welcome what tomorrow may bring ..it may just be better than yesterday.

Blog#4 moving day

As I sit in the basement on the only piece of furniture we are not taking..I realize that all the talk is now being actualized. How crazy this is or perhaps its really not. Moving is something that brings on changes and how thankful I am that I can make this change. Not just that g,d has given us the opportunity but allowed us to go in health and in a safe period of time. No present  geo political pressure of war forcing us to go. We are going because someone in this family wants to actualize a dream. We are blessed and fortunate to be able to take all of  our stuff unlike some of our grandparents. So although at this present time this is very emotional for moi. I realize that I am lucky and fortunate and thank g_d 1 milli ok n times over.

Blog#3 is this for real

Really? Really? Is this for real? Today was another reality check day. Besides for shopping for Israeli appliances to  be taken on our lift. Leaving america turned real or shall I say more real when I sat down to eat Dinner..Which turned into a miniature emotional breakdown. Sunday's in America is what I coin family day. Today we did just that. For the first time in a while we went to Brooklyn to visit my bro and his family. Ate lunch with him and my sis + 12 kids kh. As I began to mute out voices around me I wondered what life would be without them. No need to refer to death here I know no one is dying and no need to shed tears...especially this time of year I dont need  g_ds wrath for wasteful tears. Its just that as mentioned in my first blog family brings stability and having such a wonderful family as mine is, its hard,so very hard to get up, walk away and say goodbye. As most of you who read this blog may know my siblings and even envy the fact that we are so dedicated to helping each other out. I wish for it to remain this way. This is a hard thing to swallow...knowing I can't just help my family when called upon, or when I deem necessary. There are alot more aspects to family and im sure all those who made aliyah know and go through the emotions all the time..... How life goes on without them and how one adapts to their absence is a wonder to me. I certainly hope one day they will come too.. but the reality is as of now they are not.

First dose of reality

Well hello Hebrew!!  I got my first dose of reality this am when I tried to fill'out my son's school application. Yeah yeah I know Google translate. But didn't use it. Did manage to get through some of it. The best part was after reviewing the answers I did fill in ,I  noticed I mispelled ezras name. Lol. Also realized that ezra starts school before we get there. Oops. See what happens when you leave men in charge of certain things.... May have to move up the move date.....Started cleaning before the movers come. Threw away lots of wedding cards.. Do people keep those? Made ac throw out old text books. Found bunch of tapes ...not sure how they even made it this far.and empty CD cases. Book shelf looks a lot cleaner. More stuff to tackle tomorrow night. Had a potential buyer look at the house tonight. They Seemed nice. H and P. ( hope and pray)

Blog#1 07092013

Blogging. What can be more enthralling than to share my pre aliyah experiences with the rest of you guys. Just to give everyone some background on me..Most of you who know me as a person with personality but tend to be shy. I like to get through life without confrontation. However I hate being taken advantage of. So if someone will screw me I won't be shy to let them know. I think they are about 5 weeks left before we leave this country. I say 5 because I'm not counting down. Im not the one who wants to make aliya. I'm there/here for the ride. My thinking/rationale is..We only live once so why not have some excitement. Dont get me wrong..i firmly believe that Stability in life is good and healthy for all families.  However in order to achieve stability parents need to feel comfortable with their surroundings. At this time I don't forsee staying in the community I'm presently living in and my husband has been desiring to move back to Israel since we left 5 years ago. So I can say that we are both on the same page that a move is in order. How I agreed  to move to Israel is beyond me. But we are well on our way.